We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Randomize