booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
How does one acquire holy water?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
