Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
