if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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