I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
