Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i wish my penis had a tongue
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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