how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
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Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
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It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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