haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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