These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Randomize
