Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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