my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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