I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
The air taste purple.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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