tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize