I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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