So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
