I heard we made out
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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