margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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