I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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