you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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