Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
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I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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