So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
