Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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