Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
