I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
