He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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