She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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