dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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