like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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