Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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