I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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