what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
