Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
