At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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