i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
It's never too late to be topless.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
