spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
