you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
