Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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