WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
