I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I'm both gender and math confused
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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