Just cropdusted the office
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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