FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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