WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
