So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
