Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
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Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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