Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Never joke about your clitoris.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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