Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
