i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
