i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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