Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
