That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Randomize
